I Won A Hottie On The Lottery
by SavageLarxy
Summary: I had always been a normal teenager. That is, until the day I won a hottie on the lottery... [AU AkuRoku]


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts and its characters. I wish Axel was mine, though...

**A/N:** I know I really should update my other story instead, but I just had to post this one! And you'll have to excuse my crappy grammar since English isn't my first language. And sorry for my really weird sense of humor! XP

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Chapter 1: The prize

I had always been a normal teenager. My grades were good, I had nice friends, my family was helpful and... Yeah, you can take the hint, right? And the thing is, I had always thought my life would always be like that. But unfortunately, it wasn't. My whole life changed that particular Saturday.

Now you're all probably wondering what the hell I'm talking about. No, I did _not_ receive any super powers so I could join the Fantastic Four or something like that. No, Saddam Hussein did _not_ jump out of my computer, singing God Bless America. And no, my house did _not_ get blown up by some angry war veterans. You'll never be able to guess what happened. But I can tell you, if you want me to.

Okay, Saturday afternoon. I was watching TV when the doorbell rang. Dad was out playing golf, mom was grocery shopping and my twin brother Sora was on a date with his boyfriend Riku. Which means, I had to open the door. And afterwards, I really regretted that I did.

So, when I opened the door, an elderly blonde man with reading glasses stood there. "Are you Roxas?" He asked.

"Uhh, yeah."

_Wonderful, a salesman... Or maybe someone from Jehovah's Witnesses,_ I thought, sighing. I prepared myself for closing the door as fast as possible if he had nothing important to say. But what the man said was what I had expected the least to hear.

"Congratulations!" He suddenly exclaimed, a wide smile curving his lips. "You've won the first prize in our lottery with the number 813!"

I felt speechless. Me? Winning in a lottery? No way. I never won anything. And by the way... when the hell did I ever participate in some lottery? Hmm... This must be some kind of a mistake... But still, the number he said I had won with was my lucky number.

The man glanced at his watch. "You'll have to excuse me, but I have to go now." He looked up at me again and smiled merrily. "We'll just give you your prize before we go!"

Two guys came out of a truck parked on the street outside my house. They were both carrying a huge box, which looked like it could fit _me_. What the hell did they have in that? '**AXEL**' was written with bold black letters on the side of the box. Could it be the name of some new TV or something?

Suddenly, I didn't care about the fact that I hadn't participated in a lottery anymore. That box was so big it simply _must_ contain something really really cool. I greedily watched the two guys putting down the box next to me in the hall before walking out of the house.

The blonde man lightly patted the box. "I hope you'll like this." He said before turning around and walking through the door, closing it behind him.

I stared down at the box. My fingers were itching for opening it. _Please, let it be a brand new TV._ I had bugged mom for buying me a TV for the longest time, but to no avail. But... when I opened the box, there was no TV inside. Not even a small and cheap one.

Okay, honestly, if you opened a box and saw a human sitting inside it, wouldn't you get completely freaked out? I mean, I'm not the only one who thinks winning a human on the lottery is weird, right? Right? But when I opened the box, _he_ was calmly sitting there, as if he was used to being transported inside boxes to strangers' houses.

"Oh my _god_!" I screamed, frightened, when I stared down at the person inside my box.

He stood up, raising one eyebrow at my reaction. And when he stood there, I realized he was a _giant_. No, really. I mean it. He was at least a head taller than me. But... well, everyone seems to be tall when you're a dwarf like me.

I couldn't do anything but to stare at him, wide-eyed. Besides having the lenght of a giant, he also had this long spiky crimson-colored hair. His eyes were almond-shaped and piercingly green. And... was that _eyeliner_ that he was using? But that's not all. He also had one triangular purple tattoo below each eye. He was dressed in a black shirt with a couple of buttons unbuttoned, so that his muscular chest was partly visible underneath. He wore a couple of black leather pants that clung tightly to his curvaceous hips and long legs. And god, I had won – _won_ – him!

When I didn't say anything, he suddenly spoke up, "What is it?"

_He can talk!_ I stared at him, scared out of my mind. I knew I had to say _something_.

"Uhh... Are you Axel?" I lamely asked.

But honestly, Axel _could_ hade been the name of a new TV or computer. It wouldn't be so weird, considering all the strange names the electronics received nowadays.

"Yeah, of course." He rolled his eyes, as if stating the obvious.

It felt like he had just written the word 'IDIOT' on my forehead.

Axel picked up a black backpack and got out of the box. He looked at me, as if he expected _me_ to say anything. But what can you say when you are in a situation like this one? 'Okaaay, so I've won you? Cool! You can live in my closet and eat my leftovers. Does that sound good?' No, no, no. I had to come up with something else to say.

"So... what should I do with you?" I asked. "And what kind of sick lottery has hotties as prizes?"

Axel raised one eyebrow and smiled a little. "First of all, you won a _person_, not a hottie. But still, thanks for the compliment."

_God, did I actually call him a hottie? No! Idiotidiotidiot!_

"And second of all, I'm like your servant. I have to do whatever you tell me to." Axel told me. "I have the rules for owning me here."

He fished up a paper from his backpack and gave it to me. I took it from him and immediately started to read it.

'_Rules for owning Axel:_

_1. He must be fed at least two times every day.  
__2. He must not be addressed with terms such as "slave".  
__3. Despite the contract as a servant, he must be treated like an equal.  
__4. He will do whatever you ask him to, as long as it doesn't involve anything risky, like jumping from buildings.  
__5. Sexual services are included, but not if you:  
– are 40+ years old.  
_– _have kids.  
_– _are married._'

Oh my god, I had a prostituted man in my house!

How are you supposed to react at things like this? I couldn't do anything but to wordlessly stare at the paper in my hands. It felt like I had accidentally swallowed my tongue. I mean, this was freaking terrible! What kind of weird lottery had I participated in?! I couldn't even remember doing a thing like that and I had never been drunk before in my whole life!

I continued to read.

'_6. He must always have his belongings with him, although it is allowed to buy him other things.  
__7. It is strictly forbidden to divide him or sell him – this is slave trade and therefore illegal.  
__8. He must sleep for 4-12 hours every night.  
__9. He must not be forced to work too hard or in some physically impossible way.  
__10. He must not be punished by beating, as long as it isn't something within the sexual such as spanking._'

I was ready to faint any minute right now.

'_11. He must not be abandoned.  
__12. He must always have the permission to speak.  
__13. If he doesn't obey you, please contact us immediately._

_Have fun!_'

Uhh... have fun? _Have fun?!_ They gave me a hottie who was supposed to be my servant and who also could offer me sexual services and they asked me to _**have fun?!**_ Firstly, I didn't swing that way. I liked girls, not guys! Girls, okay? And secondly... well, this whole thing was just so... I don't know! But it sure as hell wasn't normal! It wasn't normal to win hotties on shady lotteries you couldn't remember you participated in!

I carefully cleared my throat. "You know, rule number five..."

"You don't have to worry about protection, if you like to do it that way. We provide you with condoms." Axel calmly said. "At least the first one-hundred ones." And then, he smiled at me in a horribly flirty way.

Okay, I was honestly on a good way to get a serious panic attack! Or some kind of a nervous breakdown. My head was spinning. I felt dizzy and nauseous. I staggered slightly and Axel immediately came to my side in order to wrap an arm around my waist.

"Are you okay?" He asked, looking concerned.

_Sure. I'm fine._ I had never been better in my whole life before. The thing is just that I had won a hottie on the lottery. A hottie I really shouldn't think was a hottie. A hottie I really didn't know what to do with.

_Shit! I've got serious problems!  
_

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A/N:** Review? Please? 


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